Exponential Equation Education: 4 Times as many Students in 1 Month

I have been working in my new classroom for exactly one month. Every single day for this past month has been more than challenging...but not exactly for the reasons I thought it was going to be. My biggest fears were: that the students would hate me for entering their space, that I would not be able to get to know the students or have them get to know me at this point in the year, and that I would not be supported. These turned out not to be true. However, I have had one realllllllllllly big change.

This past month I have gone from having approximately 35 students total to having 150. While I knew the "70 students total between two teacher" thing was unrealistic to what many high needs schools face, I have found that to be one of the largest parts of my struggle these days. While I am an effective educator and responsible adult, it has been crazy difficult sustaining  five hours with  over thirty fourteen-year olds all at different levels, mathematically and behavior wise. Grading is a whole other story... While this change is something I am working through and improving my attitude upon- I realize that having large numbers of students is something my school really needs financially.If having large classes means that my school and community get what they need- then I am more than up to work with this 'challenge."  It is a goal of mine to make my classroom more than a classroom. Instead, I want it to be a community for and by my students. Reflecting on this past month... I have a lot of work to do to get there. Everyday gets better though, and I have been able to feel myself and the students getting more comfortable through having inside jokes, to being silly, to asking for help after school,  to having students write me "stay happy" and "you got this" notes.

This past month I have had some days where I felt isolated and broken down, I have seen the guts of a school that has both teachers and students working hard to fight for what is right.  I have  never been sweatier instructing students. I have had to get "real"by emoting in ways I haven't before in front of 32 teens to show them I have high high high expectations for them and their success. I have also never worked harder, and had something this important to work for...and there is no class too large to change my drive to do that.

My next post will be about what sort of activities have been successful and which have not in my class. I am still experiementing... For instance 50% of my students though this Kendrick Lamar/graph joke was terribly cheesy. 25% thought is was "moderately funny" and the last 25% just shook their heads.

Unexpected Challenges Ahead... :)

It has been almost a year since I have updated my edu blog. What can I say? It has been my first year teaching and I have been trying so hard to do all of the things that I've set out to do my whole life since getting hired.

I have been lucky to have a dreamy first semester; one prep (AKA I only teach one type of class AKA PRAISE THE HEAVENS HALLELUJAH), an experienced/wonderful co-teacher, a small learning community with wonderful resources for students who have experienced trauma and/or difficulty in the education system thus far, a close group of colleagues, and small class sizes. As the days went by in September, I began to get scared and confused since I was hoping more and more students would show up, but alas, more left instead.

I began to realize that this lack of students would lead to some unfortunate decisions in my future at this dreamy job. I began to work extra hard and effectively to prepare for the likely cuts that were going to happen at the end of the year...however there was a different surprise in store...

We had to lay off teachers in the middle of year. The month of January was rough for myself and most of my colleagues as we were confused, stressed for the imminent semester as well as our own well-being. This is where this blog could get really negative, bitter and hopeless...but I'll continue on with the good news- I was not laid off but am switching positions instead.

I start my new position this Monday. It is in a new building. I will probably have 150 new students.  I will have all new colleagues. I will have new bosses. I will have a new curriculum.. I will have new printers. Do I know a lot? Nope! My stuff is in my car since I do not have a room yet! Will I be completely emotionally graceful with this change...heck no.

                                                               This is me on Monday

In response to the stress I am feeling I am going to write this blog again and center it on what works and does not work in terms of this different experience I will be having: entering another's classroom in the middle of the year on two weeks notice as a first year teacher.

I recognize that there are so many other teachers facing challenging experiences similar to and DEFINITELY more severe than this. I am hoping to use my own, however, to really evaluate myself as an effective and transformative educator in the midst of challenge and make this unexpected event a positive one. Hence the :) in my title.